I’m offended by profanity. What should I do?

Lighten up, ASAP. If that doesn’t work, you should probably leave. Click here: http://disney.go.com/index

I’m having an existential crisis. What should I do?

First, turn off your television entirely. Then wallpaper your room with our t-shirts and read them out loud repeatedly. Turn your attention to the absolute Trueness emblazoned upon their American-made, buttery-softness. Give it a week and then check back with us.

How much is shipping & handling?

Shipping & Handling is $5.00 for the first shirt, and $1.00 for each additional shirt after that. For those of you who are as bad at math as we are: buying multiple shirts at the same time will save you a significant % on the total price of each shirt. We have loads of radness…you know you’ll be back. You might as well buy a few shirts at once and save yourself some cash.

Is that a sales pitch? Yeah, kinda.

Is it true? Absolutely.

Will you ship internationally?

Oh yeah. Just message us with your details and we’ll get back to you.

Will you ship to APO / FPO addresses?

Hell yes.

How long will it take to get my shirt?

Shipping time varies from less than a week to two weeks, depending on a variety of mundane specifics that we won’t get into here. Some people buy a shirt and then email us the following day and want to know why it isn’t waiting for them in their mailbox. We use the USPS, not teleportation. So don’t trip. It’s all good.

Who’s the bad ass band on the jukebox?

That’s Ivory Deville. Check ‘em out: http://ivorydeville.bandcamp.com/ & https://www.facebook.com/ivorydevillemusic

Anything else I should know?

Life is short. Don’t get your panties twisted over the small stuff. Relax. Smile. Be thankful. Now get off of the internet and go have some fun.